he's going to kill me......

but i just simply can not live without him. brad, my hubby.

i met brad on his mission. he was serving in the singles ward, which i rarely attended, in our stake. i was struggling with my testimony, and had a real negative attitude. i was really 'hard' with my tats and tounge ring, but elder herkimer wasn't put off.

one time, my parents were having a missionary's open house and the elders were invited. elder herkimer told me a story about his childhood in michigan. he told me he saved his allowance to buy two puppies. when he did he took them often in the mountains for walks etc. well in a few years, the female dog was attacked by a mountain lion and died. then the boy dog was so grief stricken he later died where the girl dog was burried. "to this day a red fern grows there."

sound familar?? he got me. i had never heard that story, and totally believed him!! little skunk. at that moment, i knew he'd have a role in my life.

well fast forward ten years and here we are. several moves, a new career, 3 children, and the list goes on. he is my absolute everything, and i am so thankful for him. he knows everything about me, and is okay with it.

i love you lt. herkimer.

isabelle chloe

as i moved away from my family 10 years ago, i was so twitterpated i never thought of what i'd miss. my sister gillian got married 2 months after i did, and i didn't have the documents to go across the border. so i missed her wedding. then the following feb she had a baby girl. isabelle chloe. missed that too. so the following june my sister leah got married and i had recieved my visa so i was able to go and be a bridesmaid at her wedding. that week i was up was the first time i'd get to hold, kiss and cuddle my new little niece. sadly it was the last as well. isabelle died peacefully in her sleep the following month. what heartbreak for my sister. i dropped everything to be by her side through this trial.

today is her birthday, and she would be 9. i can honestly say not a day goes by when i don't think of her and her mother. i am so grateful for the plan of salvation that allows us to be together forever. i am also grateful for gillian and her strength, and example of carrying on even on the toughest days.

i know she is watching over her mom, dad and brother, and in some ways, all of us. i think of the saying "Because someone we love is in heaven, we feel a little bit of heaven in our home." and the comfort it can bring.

we love and miss you dearly isabelle.

a year of blessings

a dear friend of mine, whom i miss dearly and really try to emulate, last year did her blog about all her blessings. i thought i would try it this year seeing i do have so much to be thankful for. it will really help me stay postive each week seeing what little things i am blessed with in my life. there is so much i take for granted. so each week i will post a blessing that i have in my life. i hope it's not too boring for you all!
my first blessing is family dinners. one thing growing up is we always had dinner together as a family. i actually thought everyone did until i got married and saw that some families are just "too busy" to eat together. thanks mom for enstilling this value in my life to pass down to my children.